After we returned home from Vietnam, we really didn’t talk much about adding to our family. We were enjoying getting to know Kennison and focusing all of our time and attention on her. We knew we wanted more children, but there was certainly no rush – for once in my life, I was living in the moment, not thinking about what was missing – just soaking up the joy of parenting Kennison.

I was working for Children’s Hope at that time, which is how, in early May, I became aware of a family who was adopting a little girl from Vietnam. They were actually in Vietnam with her, and had decided she wasn’t meant to be a member of their family. CHI told the family they needed to follow through with everything on the Vietnam end so that she could come to the United States. Once they returned, CHI would do everything they could to place the little girl in a new family. However, if the little girl stayed in Vietnam, there would be nothing that could be done for her – she would be returned to the orphanage, and the entire process would begin again for her. The family agreed to bring her to the US, but kept insisting they were not interested in becoming her permanent family.

When I heard about this little girl, I was heartbroken for her. When we had been in Vietnam, I had seen so many older children in the orphanage. I wondered how many babies they had seen leave, and if they still dreamed of a family of their own. I told Kenny while we were there that I hoped to come back some day and adopt an older child. So naturally, when I learned of this family’s situation, my mind immediately jumped to the idea of making this little girl a part of our family. She was 3 years old and had some minor medical issues, but certainly nothing we couldn’t handle. I told Kenny about her, talked with the director of the CHI branch in KC, and we all prayed about it.

The day finally came when the little girl and her temporary family were returning to Kansas City. We still hadn’t made up our mind about what to do, even though my boss said she would totally support us if we decided we wanted to pursue an adoption with this little girl. We didn’t know if the family would want someone to take the girl from them at the airport, or if they’d want to take her home with them until a permanent family was found. Kenny and I knew that if we decided to adopt this little girl, we could potentially have her in our home in a matter of hours. It was an intense situation!

It was a Saturday morning, and for some reason, Kenny decided to go into work. When I woke up, I started my normal weekend routine. When I went into the bathroom, I suddenly had the urge to take a pregnancy test. I can’t even tell you why I did this – I had no symptoms, and I didn’t think anything about it. I just decided I should take one. When it turned out to be positive, I absolutely couldn’t believe it. I called Kenny and gave him the news. I think his response was something like, “Really?” I was scared out of my mind. After two miscarriages, I had pretty much decided I didn’t want to have any biological children. I loved Kennison so much, and I was fine with adopting the rest of our kids. I hadn’t really told Kenny that I had made this decision without him, but God has a funny way of taking our plans and turning them on end.

Anyway, we eventually came to the decision that we couldn’t possibly adopt the little girl who had been displaced from her family. It would just be too much on our family, emotionally, physically, financially… if the pregnancy survived, we would be adding 3 kids to our family in the span of about 14 months. We knew we just couldn’t handle it.

So, without knowing whether we would ever have the new little baby, we decided not to pursue the adoption of the little girl. Obviously, this turned out to be the best decision, as Colton is here and now and amazing. And, the little girl ended up finding her perfect family – the family who really wanted to adopt her when they first saw her picture, but were in line behind another family to look at her paperwork. God had everything all planned out, and we just needed to follow His plan for us! I mean seriously – I shouldn’t have even registered as pregnant on that test. God was totally sending us a message!

So, even though my pregnancy consisted of at least seven months of throwing up, Colton is so totally worth it! He is such a sweet little boy, and we are so blessed to have this miracle we didn’t even know we were missing. God is so good!

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